Cat stories at the magical dumpster – chapter 18
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In cat dreams, human legs act as they’re supposed to
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In cat dreams, human legs behave much smarter and more properly than in reality. They follow cats obediently and literally beg everyone to scratch them.
“Oh, dear cat, please scratch us!”, “Oh, cute kitty, don’t you want to shred our young flesh with your teeth?”, “Yes-yes, as painful as you can… Ah, thanks!”
Why do human legs want to be scratched? Because without the scratches they look inappropriately, even indecently! Legs like these are always ashamed of their inferiority, blush and try to hide under the table. It makes perfect sense, dear reader, because if you’re not scratched, nobody needs you…
Caring human hands in the Magical Dumpster
The Magical Dumpster is full of human hands wandering in the space, detached from their bodies. Those caring hands constantly pet everyone, frequently becoming a victim to sharp cat teeth.
If you thought that cats are violent beings, always willing to cause pain, you’re wrong. Cats are immensely kind. And only by their great kindness they help hands to accomplish their main mission in life – to be scratched and bitten.
By the way, there is a cat superstition that says: “If you won’t scratch or bite a hand in time, one day it will grab you by the neck.” In cat philosophy it’s called the Cycle of the Cat Samsara. Or just the Sarah’s Cycle, to keep it simple.
The house cats have no one to complain to…
Technically, while sleeping, every cat lives in the Magical Dumpster and not in your apartment. But they come back to you right after they wake up. And after coming back to you, they immediately disappear from the Magical Dumpster.
Most of the house cats are very annoyed by this way of things. You’ve just met a fluffy, pretty kitty, and, boom, she disappears without a sign! No warning, no “sorry”, no kiss-goodbye.
She could at least hint that she will disappear now! Oh, so she woke up, you see, huh… And what if I told you that the love of my life was being born? No one cares. Complain to the skies, complain to whoever you want.
“Bark!” – said an angry voice from the sky.
Of course, you have never liked our complaints. And what do you think, breaking hearts is okay?
“Bark, bark, bark!” – said the voice from the sky again.
Yes, yes, I get it. I don’t even have one soul to complain to…