Cat stories at the magical dumpster – chapter 11
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If a cat is bored, it finds an owner
You’ve probably noticed that cats are the smartest beings in the world. How do I know? Because they stay silent all day long, and silence is a definite sign of intelligence.
Cats’ mind is revealed the best in the Magical Dumpster. The most progressive and innovative methods for educating cat owners are developed here, in the cats’ dreamland.
Every owner-training crash course begins with the legendary line: “The cat owner must know his place!” followed by a big round of cats’ applause. If a cat owner doesn’t know his place, and sits in a cat chair every time, it’s your fault as a cat, and not his own.
What are people worth? Did you see their brains? No, and no one did. Maybe it doesn’t even exist! Why do people need brains?
Nature only gives what is needed, and you don’t need an intellect to put a cat food in a bowl. You only need hands and eyes to see where you put it.
The owner-training crash course
By the way, if cat food misses the bowl, you must immediately scratch the owner that committed this shameful crime. And this is absolutely fair! They may not have a brain, but their eyes are still there!
Why should an owner be scratched right away? So he can understand what he got scratched for! Human memory is weak and undeveloped. Why? Because it has no place to live in.
For example, cats’ memory is located in their minds, while human memory is homeless. It wanders here and there in a human body from a stomach to a bladder, and all for nothing…
With such a memory, no wonder why people do most of the things automatically. They don’t even remember what they did a few minutes ago. Sometimes they go to the toilet and then get back after five minutes. I want to shout: “You’ve already been there, silly!”, but so what?
They don’t even understand a normal cat language. Of course, you can scratch a new sofa, to express your thoughts… But it’s a shame that all the furniture is already damaged because of their foolishness. Feels like we live in a dump, phooey!
